2012 Post Season Press Conference

I picture myself at a podium with about 3 microphones in front of me (all I could find) and absolutely no reporters to cover my post season press conference in my dining room. Not even ESPN Losers 2. But there is a sweet spread if anyone shows up of Peanut Butter, Jelly, and a loaf of Giant Eagle bread.  Not to mention a 2 Liter bottle of Pepsi with cups to boot……ah the good life.

Anyway….without further ado I’ll take the first question……

Anyone? (crickets)

Ok then I’ll just get us started.

This week we have Hampton with a knee, Keissel with a groin………I hate when coaches go through the injuries like that at press conferences. Just say what’s wrong. So if someone goes down with an anal fissure (it has happened) do we say…..’ya Joe is out with an anus….” Cmon.  Although it is clear Ike Taylor was out Sunday with a brain.

Steeler fans are gonna hate me for saying this but I think the best QB of all time…..the one Id pick if I had to start a team to defend my life or win me a million dollars….was John Elway. He had the strongest arm I’ve ever seen, could scramble like no other..WAS a gamer!!! Look at his playoff comebacks (he has a DRIVE named after him!) and track record and you have what people in Denver wish Tebow was…..or hope he WILL BE. Tim shouldn’t even be mentioned in the same spoken language as Elway yet…and definitely not within earshot of anyone else…… #7 was the man long before OUR #7 was the man. (Elway is also the reason Ben is #7). Very similar though. Sorry Brett. I love you man but Elway was the best I’ve ever seen.

With the new OT rules…why is it Taylor, Munday, etc……didn’t’ do ANYTHING, including horse collar, face mask, etc…….to get the WR down. If he scores game over….if they get a FG we get the ball and a chance to win….ah….that Rocky Mountain air……

What do Aaron Smith, Casey Hampton, Brett Keisel, Ryan Clark, Rahsaad Mendenhall, Marquise Pouncey, Ben Rothlisberger, Mwelde Moore, and David Woodley all have in common?......oh never mind…..I’m starting to sound like a whiny little girl.

Is it me or are the San Diego Chargers ALWAYS playing their best ball on the last game of the season just in time to miss the playoffs……how does Norv Turner keep coming back? That’s too bad The Chargers took Phillip Rivers instead of Ben…..hahahahahahahahahahah

When I get frustrated I look west and think, “what would it be like to root for football in Ohio?” Wow are we lucky and spoiled.  Even the Pirates have won more playoff games in the last 19 yrs than the Bengals…..and they can’t even sell out a stadium for essentially a playoff game in week 17…..sorry Curtis.

When are they gonna stop HOPING they find referees that are decent among engineers and accountants and have a rigorous school where they are insane athletes like the players and have to pass yrs of classes, and then that is their only job?  Would be worth the cash…….and get the damn circus animals out of the replay booth who obviously are not watching the same replays we are……it amazes me how often they are wrong.

What sucks the most about this Steeler season as I look back is that it was basically over sometime around midnight on November 6^th. I knew it then too. One play left in the game to close out the Ravens and take control of the division …..and Torrey M………. F…………n………Smith gets  behind the D……(sound familiar?) and wins the game with seconds left…on OUR field. If that doesn’t happen we’re still waiting for the Texans to come to US while we rest up and get people healthy. One play…….that’s why you should play like Troy……like it’s your last play ever..on EVERY down.

Looking ahead…why not.

2012 schedule:

HOME – DENVER!!! KC Philly Washington (Jets or Tennessee) Cincy  Clev  Balt AWAY – Oakland  SanDiego  Dallas NYGiants (Jets or Tennesse) Cincy Clev Balt Ugh…. 11-5…….playoffs…..take out Torrey Smith and we’re golden.  Anyone else hate fantasy football as much as I do now? It’s been 23 years and I cant take it anymore…. We may have had a better chance at a 67-yd FG by Suisam than the debacle of our last 2 plays in regulation…I have a better chance of going out with Alyssa Milano than…….never mind. Yes I’m still married. It was a joke. Anyone count the dropped balls by Steeler WRs? Or screwed up routes? Antonio Brown started to get it done in the 2nd half but what happened in the first? Ya know I looked up to see Tim Tebows one TD pass and for a second I could have sworn it was a FG kick! He threw his first spiral on the last play of the game I think…..and ya ya…he got it done……. his WR got it done that’s for sure…..and Ike Taylor helped……  Denver: 8 total yards in the first quarter  Steelers: 157 total yards in the first quarter. Did John Fox out coach Mike Tomlin? They must have adjusted something…..But then Mike can’t catch the ball and doesn’t have clones of Pouncey on the sidelines……. Anyone else want to punch Phil Simms in the teeth??? What about Shannon Sharpe? As much as I would hate it, how entertaining would a New England Green Bay Super Bowl rematch be? Where would the over/under be on that bad boy? I think the most depressing thing about the end of every season that ends in the playoffs is the thought of how long you have to wait to get back to this point. I have to end a school year and start another just to get to meaningful Steeler football. Maybe that’s why my life is flying by. I have to stop measuring it in seasons and semesters. Or it could be I have to wonderful kids that are growing up way too fast. I’ve been looking on Craig’s List for cheap time machines….cant find any. But when I do…….I’m getting a sniper rifle and going back to that Torrey Smith play in November. Peace….Let’s go Pens!